Knots

Published June 12, 2016 by dividinguplife

My mother finally convinced my grandmother that she would actually come over this weekend. My husband and I had plans to go to the beach for the day on Saturday, so we figured it would be nice for my grandma to have some company while we were gone. 

We drove the hour and ten minutes to pick her up. I dreaded it the entire time. My mother is the kind of woman that sucks the energy right out of your body to use for herself. I am extremely introverted, and she is very extroverted. She takes and takes and takes energy, meanwhile I’m sagging in the corner of the seat, trying to block her out. 

I’ve never seen where she lives. She has lived with this man for almost two years, I think. It’s a single wide trailer probably made in the 80’s. When my husband and I went in, it was like entering the house of a hoarder. The man she lives with has shit in every available space in the trailer. There were holes in the wall, roaches crawling around, and it smelled like pot. My mom had made mention that she had some matted hair she wanted me to work on this weekend, because she has had a stroke and her left hand doesn’t work like it should. She claimed that it was a result of her washing her hair and putting it up in a clip and going to sleep. It is the result of my mother not brushing her hair for a month or more. Her hair probably came down to her butt, but it was so matted in three different places that it only came down to her neck. 

I spent my entire weekend putting cooking oil, conditioner, and who knows what else, in her hair to try to pull her hair. I cut half of the knots to try to free more of her hair. I was concerned that my mom would end up with no hair on her head – it was that bad. Last night I covered her hair in conditioner, wrapped it in plastic wrap, and she went to bed to let it soak in overnight. This morning I washed her hair, cut cut pull, washed hair, cut cut pull, washed hair for a third time, and finally finished with the last of the knots. 

Mom Hair

For hair that went all the way down her back, I was only able to salvage this much of it, and honestly I was surprised that I saved that much. My entire life, I waited for the day that karma would knock on my mom’s door. I realized this weekend, that it finally has. I feel like I should be more sad about this, and I am sad for her, but not nearly as much as I am still pissed at the childhood she gave me and my brother.

I took her back home today. I breathed a sigh of relief after she was safely inside her trailer with her pot-smoking boyfriend. The entire drive there, I wanted to listen to music, and she wanted to talk about everyone and everything in such a negative light. Her negativity really drives me insane. She wears me out on all fronts. 

My husband and I never made it to the beach on Saturday because my grandmother had an allergic reaction of some medication for her bladder infection. She started hallucinating and running a fever, so we called the ambulance out to get her. They kept her until the prescription wore off and she started getting back into her right mind. 

Here is to hoping that next weekend is less insane. 

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